I just finished a 7 week bible study called “Birds in my Mustard Tree” by Susanne Scheppmann. It was a good study about faith and learning to trust God. Trusting God is the most difficult part of faith. We are reasoning beings and we like proof that we can touch and see all the time. We like to be in control too and trusting in something that might be asking us to let go of that control is very difficult.
I was thinking about how very different the statement “I believe in God” is to the statement “I believe God.” The latter has the ability to be life-changing. The former, simply believing in God, believing in his existence, is close to useless. Believing that God can do what He says He can do and reorienting our decisions and our lives around this fact…now that’s powerful!
When I was kid and a teenager. I believed in God, but this belief rarely influenced the decisions in my life. It was just something I accepted. It wasn’t until I conscientiously and humbly began seeking Him out with every corner of my heart that I discovered that my mere belief could change to actually believing Him and everything that encompasses.
I made a choice to trust Him 100%, to lay down my need to always be in control, or the need to always be right, or the need for answers to all my “why” questions. It was almost as if I was asking God to prove himself to me. Not in a mocking way…but in a “desperate, no other way to turn” way. I wanted real peace. I wanted real answers. And if this was the way to get that…I was at the point in my life where I was willing to try it!
God, I am going to believe you. I am going to trust that you are who you say you are. I am going to believe that you really do care about me as much as I really, really hope you do. I am going to cling to You with what little faith I have.
An amazing thing happened in my life. God showed up. Despite my puny faith, God showed up! From that moment on, I have firmly believed that how big our faith is is never a factor in whether we can trust God or whether we find God. The factor is always how willing and how humble and how open we allow our heart to be.