One of the benefits to blogging and writing has been a deeper awareness of how often I don’t take my own advice. When I write I know the Lord intends for my posts to challenge me too. Putting my thoughts and my convictions down reminds me to cry out to the Lord and say…Okay, Lord, help me to practice what I preach. Help me to live this out. Help me to claim Your truths and Your promises for my own life. I don’t want these to just be words on a page. I want these words to grow me into the person You desire me to be. I want my words to win Your approval. That’s all that matters.
The other day I responded to a tweet on Twitter from a lady who said this, “Sometimes, when I read my favorite blogs, I think I don’t do “serious” work. Then, I think, well, I do what I do.”
My response to her was “textbook” encouragement… “and no one does what you do exactly the way you do it! Thankful God uses us just the way He wants.” 🙂
The truth is, on a good day, this is what Scenic Route Eileen would tell everyone. This is what I know God wants me to know. However, on a bad day, I struggle just like this twitter friend. I read other writers and other bloggers and that small voice of discouragement starts to get louder and louder. You will never write like them. Your words will never matter like their words matter.
Gosh, I don’t know about you but sometimes I just want to take that small punk voice out back in the alley and beat the snot out of her!
I’ve been reading Soul Print by Mark Batterson and in his book he discusses the fact that we often wait to do something wrong when no one is looking and we make sure to do the right thing when we have an audience. He goes on to say that we like to refer to this as human nature but the truth is, the more accurate definition of this behavior is, it’s our sinful nature. Our sinful nature doing what it does best.
And here’s what he said on the subject that resonated with me…”It’s our unsanctified desire for self-glorification. This will seem counter intuitive, but you don’t really care about people until you don’t care what they think. Until you’ve been crucified to their opinions of you, you can’t really help them the way you should. You have to die to them. And while you’re at it, you might as well die to your agenda, your approval ratings and your reputations.”
Today, I read a portion of Psalm 17. And, like I so often do, I flipped to the Message translation and read that version too.
“Go ahead, examine me from inside out, surprise me in the middle of the night- You’ll find I’m just what I say I am. My words don’t run loose. I’m not trying to get my way in the world’s way. I’m trying to get your way, your Word’s way. I’m staying on your trail; I’m putting one foot In front of the other. I’m not giving up.”
That’s what I want too, Lord. More than anything. Help me, Lord, to claim your truths for my life too. Help me to be the same person on paper as I am in the middle of the night when no one sees me but You!
Help me, Lord, to live this verse out everyday…
Obviously, I’m not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ’s servant. (Galatians 1:10)