One Scary God Idea!

“I’d rather have one God idea than a thousand good ideas. Good ideas are good but God ideas change the course of history.” Mark Batterson

I read these words the other day from Mark Batterson’s latest book “Whisper”. It made me think back on the season in my life when I was finally willing to leave life navigation up to the Lord. I was done attempting to “plan my own course.” (Proverbs 16:19) I had come to this conclusion in my heart: If God is who He says He is then why not give Him the benefit of the doubt? Why not choose to trust Him wholeheartedly? After all, the alternative hadn’t really been working out all too well for me. I had lost everything.  I had failed miserably at creating the safe, predictable little world I had desired to live in. My “plan” not only backfired…it basically blew up in my face and I was left with pieces of a life that needed to somehow be put back together.

And, it was one God idea, one scary God idea, that changed the course of my life in the most beautiful way.

It showed up as a whisper. “This drinking problem, Eileen…you need to give this to ME…completely.”  

And then my baffled response.   You’ve got to be kidding, Lord?  How?  If You truly know all my thoughts and all my desires… then You must know that I have NO desire to stop drinking. At this season in my life, You know that I want to drink more than I want You.

And the whisper responded:  then how do we change your desire? 

And my heart knew the answer: You pray for it, Lord.  I ask You for it, Lord.

And so, a God idea planted its tiny seed in my heart and this prayer became my battle cry for the next several months.  “Lord, make my desire for You stronger than my desire to drink.”  I prayed it through failure. I prayed it through hangovers…I prayed it instead of running away or hiding or justifying.  I prayed it through tears. I prayed it through anger. I prayed it through tantrums. I prayed  it on my knees in humble desperation. “LORD, make my desire for You stronger than my desire to drink!”  

And then one morning, my tired heart had nothing left.  “I give up, Lord.”

And that’s when it happened.  The God idea taking root in my heart, broke through out into the daylight. His vines grabbed my weary soul and wrapped me up in an unexplainable peace…and, at that very moment, the course of history was changed forever!

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