It’s about this time of year, every year, when memories of Christmases past begin to flood my brain. Many of these recollections are funny ones. Have I ever shared the Christmas corn story with you? I don’t think so. It was a tradition for our family to host Christmas dinner every year when I was a child. For years and years, this is how the routine would go. Thanksgiving was always held at The Smiths house (dear, dear, family friends who might as well have been another set of grandparents to me and my brothers). New Year’s Day dinner was always at my grandparents’ house (the ones from dad’s side of the family). And, we always, always had the traditional pork, sauerkraut and mashed potatoes. I remember how “appalled” I was the first year sauerkraut and mashed potatoes were not part of the New Year’s Day dinner menu. What? Where’s the sauerkraut?!
Christmas Day dinner was always held at our house. The Smiths and my grandparents were always there. One year, when I was around thirteen, my mom decided to try a new cooking technique for some corn on the cob. She had read about it in a magazine. Apparently, the dishwasher, is a multi-use kitchen appliance. Who knew you could also cook ears of corn in it? So, my mom wrapped all the ears in foil and stuck them in the dishwasher. She made sure to do this under the radar because there was one person who would be sitting at our dinner table who we were certain would not eat corn from the dishwasher. My grandma. Prior to Grandma’s arrival, my older brother Ed and I were instructed to NOT mention how the corn had been cooked. It was to be top-secret information since Grandma was quite particular. Corn cooked anywhere other than the stove top would be too traumatic for her, especially on Christmas Day.
You will be happy to know that we succeeded at keeping Grandma in the dark about the corn. She didn’t even catch on when my brother commented after every couple bites, “Wow, Mom, this corn is so good…it tastes so clean!”
< Insert piercing mother eyes here.>
What about you? Do you have any funny Christmas memories to share?