Hidden Away

I do my writing on a small laptop. Sometimes while tapping away on my tiny device, I feel like I resemble the female version of Mr. Incredible disproportionately hunched over his office desk. Several months ago, my husband bought me a large 64 inch, 36 inch, 20 inch monitor to hook up to my laptop. Okay, so I am not sure of the exact size. I do know it’s a much bigger monitor than I am used to using.  I have tried, unsuccessfully, to establish a meaningful relationship with my new monitor. Recently, I had to have the “it’s not you it’s me” conversation with it.

I prefer to write hidden away in a corner somewhere. Even when I take my laptop out to a coffee shop, I try to find a seat where the least amount of eyes can see me and my monitor.  For the last couple of years, I’ve been given the task of writing on the mission team blog while down in the Dominican Republic. The computer we used at the mission  guest house is in the large central gathering room and every night I was forced to write blog posts about our adventures with a room full of people present. The horror!  Periodically, one of my team members would wander over and sit down next to me as I was typing. I would freeze up like a deer in headlights. And, as gently as I could, I would say…”um…could you please…um…go away”.

When I write, I like to be alone. With the big monitor my husband so lovingly bought me, I feel as if the whole world can see what I am writing. I don’t like that. I know this stems from being an insecure writer who is petrified of her words being seen before she decides to press the post button.

I’m curious now.  Do you struggle with being okay with others prematurely seeing what you are creating?

I can’t be the only quirky, insecure, creative, can I?

Linking up with Jeff Goins who is discussing creative space on his blog today.  Please take a moment to read his great thoughts on the subject  The Most Important Part of the Creative Life.

14 thoughts on “Hidden Away

    1. Eileen Post author

      Amy, I see that we would fight over the last table in the corner! I’ve been known to sit in my car rather than sit in a crowded coffee shop. 🙂

  1. Debi Baker

    I’m that way a little. I have a bigger problem with ‘sharing’ my monitor period! I will sit down in the office of our [my hubby and mine] shop or on the couch at night with my laptop. As I am perusing the internet…mostly FaceBook and email…my hubby will ‘read along with me.’ It drives me nuts! First, he knows nothing about FaceBook and if he sees a name he doesn’t recognize he wants to know ‘who it that.’ I have tried and tried to explain to him that I don’t know every person whose name appears. I’ve tried to tell him that other friends of my friends are posting, etc. He just doesn’t get it. Email…forget it. He just doesn’t get the whole ‘cyber’ world. So, no, you are not the only quirky, insecure, creative person around. *smiles*

    Loved this post! Have a great day!

    1. Eileen Post author

      Debi, this is so funny! Yeah, I’m not much for someone standing over me and reading along either. Although if my husband is sitting on the couch next to me with his computer I have a hard time not reading what’s on his screen. I usually don’t comment though on what he’s looking at. It’s just like reading the back of the box of cereal. It’s there…might as well see if there’s anything interesting!

  2. Anne

    I think I would be ok with folks seeing my “stuff” before it was finished if they didn’t feel the need to try to offer “constructive criticism.” That, although offered in a helpful and non-deprecating manner, always puts me in a defensive posture and completely puts a halt to my creativity. Something I need to work on.

  3. Tracy

    Hi Eileen, I love learning all these little things about the people whose blogs I really enjoy. I can just picture you tapping away. I think I too would rather not have my incomplete work looked at before its the master piece (yeah right) I intend it to be 🙂 Anyway, have a great week and may the words flow from your heart and mind as God places them there.
    God bless

  4. Kandi


    Oh my gosh yes I do not like anyone seeing what I am writing until it is finished. And I give you cheers because I could write under such dreadful circumstances like you did in the Dominican :). I have my own little room with ambience lighting and smelly candles, my writing conditions have to be a certain way otherwise it gets rather ugly.

    Blessings to you Eileen.

  5. Karl Bowden

    Hi Eileen,

    Great post. I am an extrovert oriented person, but when it comes to writing, working or studying, I also do my best work in private, and behind a closed door. My creative juices seem to flow best in a more introverted setting. And in my photo shooting, I most enjoy solo outings to hunt for new things to capture with my camera. On the other hand, I have had plenty of good photo safaris with others there too.!


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