The other day my son told me there was a boy in his class that fakes needing to go to the bathroom all the time. When I asked him why, he said the boy hates doing his work so he fakes needing a bathroom break. He and I then kind of joked about how “funny” it is that when people fake they think they are being smart but everyone around them can see right through it.
This conversation brought up a memory of when I was in kindergarten and my mom was hired on as the secretary at my school. I thought it was cool that I could potentially get to see her during my school days. And, a weird thing started happening to me. Every single day, I became the poor little girl who didn’t feel well in class. Every single day, I became the poor little girl who needed her teacher to send her to the nurse’s office.
The nurse’s office happened to be right next door to where my mom worked.
I still love my mom’s solution to my faking. She didn’t dwell on the deception. She didn’t get mad at me. Instead, she responded with love. She told me that now that she worked at my school every Friday would become a special day. Instead of having to ride the bus home with my brothers, I could come to her office, wait for her to finish her work, and she and I would ride home together.
Amazingly, my daily trips to the nurse’s office abruptly ended.
This story reminded me that often when people are obviously faking and being deceptive our first reaction is to punish them or call them on it. But, I wonder, if there is ever a time when a better solution would be to just lavish them in love. Because maybe deep down, that’s all some fakers and mask wearers are really wanting and needing…to feel special…to feel loved.
Just a thought for today.
Who might need a little extra attention and love in your life?