It’s my mom’s birthday today. She would have been 77 years old. Every year on the blog I like to do something special in honor of this day. As many of you know, my mom and I were Scrabble fanatics! Today I wrote about her playing Scrabble with Jesus.

She sits down at the Scrabble board
picks out her hand of seven

She looks across the table as her Lord
now chooses His

He lifts each tile from the bag
with His nail scarred hand of grace

And, yes, you’re probably right

Sometimes she asks Him for another game
just to see those hands again

She watches them lay down
each tile on the board

She watches and remembers
how they touched her life that day

She watches and remembers
Her game of life…forever changed

For Sharon Muldowney (1936-1991)

A couple of weeks ago I came across this brave little guy while out for a walk with my dog.  Usually the turtles I meet along the path will quickly pull their necks back into the safety of their shell. Not this guy. I hovered over him like a giant and he continued to stand his turtle ground.  Neck out…eyes wide open.

Today, I’ve started the Hillsong 40 Days devotional..thanks to my Twitter friend from the land down under, Jason Ewart (who told me about it). You can check it out here on YouVersion too.

The verse for reflection on the first day comes from Psalm 90:12

Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.

As I studied my turtle picture, I wondered, was the risk he took to remain out of his shell a wise thing for him to do?   I’m certain it breaks the number one turtle safety rule:  When huge giant approaches, retreat, retreat!!  Yet, he survived. His choice to not retreat paid off.  His choice to keep his eyes open during a threat didn’t cause injury to him.

Just like this turtle, we have similar choices we must make every day.  There are times when the best thing we can do is retreat.

“For you have been my refuge, a strong tower against the foe.” (Psalm 61:3)  We rest in His arms until the storm is over.

Yet sometimes learning to live intentionally, and making every moment in our day count requires us to stand our ground and to not retreat into the safety of the familiar.

“Be strong. Take courage. Don’t be intimidated. Don’t give them a second thought because God, your God, is striding ahead of you. He’s right there with you. He won’t let you down; he won’t leave you.” (Deut 31: 6 Message)

This turtle’s little act of courage reminded me that sometimes the wisest choice we can make is to step out of our comfort zone (stick our neck out) and refuse to close our eyes to the scariness around us.

Sometimes that’s where we discover that the giant situation towering over us is more terrifying in the dark than in the light.

I am reminded of the verse in Ecclesiastes 3: “There’s an opportune time to do things, a right time for everything on the earth”

Lord, give us the wisdom today to know what to do. Help us to know when to retreat, when to stand our ground, and when to move forward full speed ahead.

Give us the courage to live with our eyes wide open.

This weekend, the reality that I will be moving from North Carolina in less than two weeks seemed to sink in a little more.  Despite the growing stacks of moving boxes in my living room, the stripped down counters and naked walls, I still don’t think this journey will feel completely real until the moving truck is sitting in my driveway.

My friends had a little girl’s going away party for me on Saturday.  They each took a moment to share some really nice memories. Some of the things they shared I remembered clearly, other memories I had completely forgotten about.

I told my friends that these last 12 years have been the best years of my life.  I arrived into town when I was 28 years old.  I was starting over with nothing but two dogs, some kitchen pots and pans and a commitment I made in prayer to the Lord that I was determined to do life on His terms during this new chapter.  I was done running away from my fears. I was done settling.  I desired something better.  My only plan was to cling tightly to the One who could offer that to me.

Over the past 12 years I’ve watched God take my life and make something beautiful out of all the broken pieces.  He’s given me joy and freedom and peace. Life has not been without trials or without heartache but He has been true to His word.  He has held onto me through all of life’s ups and downs.

As I stood next to my friend, Michelle, at church yesterday, and sung these words, my mind went back to that first summer in North Carolina.

This is amazing grace
This is unfailing love
That You would take my place
That You would bear my cross
You would lay down Your life
That I would be set free
Jesus, I sing for
All that You’ve done for me 

So much had changed and yet here I was, blessed to be standing next to the same friend who first reached out to me when I arrived in town. We have journeyed this portion of the road together the whole time.  Our sons have grown up together.  We’ve encouraged one another.  We’ve laughed with one another.  And, yes, we’ve cried with one another.

I know the two of us have not been on a long journey to Mordor and I know that neither of us are hobbits (Michelle is way too tall to be a hobbit) but I couldn’t help but think of the scene in Lord of the Rings when Frodo says to his best friend, Sam, “I’m glad to be with you, Samwise Gamgee…here, at the end of all things.”

I know that this is only the end of this particular chapter.  Our friendship will go on…but it will be different and there will be adjustments. And, even though I can’t pack up my friend, Michelle, and take her with me,  I am thankful that I can pack up 12 years of God’s grace and goodness and carry that with me.  I am looking forward to what the Lord has planned next in both of our lives!

It’s Friday and time for another link-up with Lisa-Jo for Five Minute Friday. Friday is a time when we “write for five minutes not worrying everything is just right.” You can join in the fun HERE.

PROMPT: SONG

Other than the singing birds outside my office window, the gurgling song the coffee machine plays each morning is my favorite tune to hear. In a dark and sleeping house, it arrives like a singing telegram sent to brighten my day.

We’re moving in couple of weeks.  I’m going to miss the sound of the geese splashing and honking behind our house. I’m going to miss the tired song my old refrigerator sings. It’s a country song, I think, and goes something like this, “you should have put me out to pasture five-years ago!”

Yet one thing’s for sure, wherever we land, wherever home ends up, my morning liquid telegram will know where to reach me.

You can be sure it will continue to sing.

“Let’s get this party started!”

Meanwhile, Saul was still breathing out murderous threats against the Lord’s disciples. He went to the high priest  and asked him for letters to the synagogues in Damascus, so that if he found any there who belonged to the Way, whether men or women, he might take them as prisoners to Jerusalem. As he neared Damascus on his journey, suddenly a light from heaven flashed around him. He fell to the ground and heard a voice say to him, “Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?”

 “Who are you, Lord?” Saul asked.

“I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting,” he replied. “Now get up and go into the city, and you will be told what you must do.”

 The men traveling with Saul stood there speechless; they heard the sound but did not see anyone.  Saul got up from the ground, but when he opened his eyes he could see nothing. So they led him by the hand into Damascus.  For three days he was blind, and did not eat or drink anything. ~Acts 9:1-9

Today I read this beautiful account again of Saul seeing the light. Saul thought his purpose was to bring all believers of Jesus Christ he found in the town of Damascus back to Jerusalem in chains. That’s why he was traveling along that road. He had a mission and a purpose he believed strongly in.

One of the reasons I love this account is because it shows what incredible lengths God will go to make sure that His plan trumps our mission. I wonder what Saul thought and prayed about as he sat in the dark for three days. He wasn’t 100% sure he would ever see again. I wonder at what point in the whole process Saul surrendered his mission of persecution to God’s plan of love. I wonder when he truly saw the light.

Saul’s mission that day was to bring believers back in chains. God’s mission was to set a man free from his chains. God’s mission was to take a man traveling along in darkness and shine the light of Truth into his heart. God’s mission was to take all the wrong turns Saul had made in his past and use them as evidence that no one is beyond His reach!  No one!

Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble,
and he saved them from their distress.
He brought them out of darkness, the utter darkness,
and broke away their chains.
Psalm 107: 13-14

God uses broken things. It takes broken soil to produce a crop, broken clouds to give rain, broken grain to give bread, broken bread to give strength. It is the broken alabaster box that gives forth perfume. It is Peter, weeping bitterly, who returns to greater power than ever. ~Vance Havner

I came across another injured butterfly yesterday. A butterfly that has lost its ability to fly makes me sad and yet I can’t help but rejoice at what our Creator can do when we lose the ability to lift our wings into the air. It reminds me of the old song Wind Beneath My Wings.

Our brokenness doesn’t for one minute discourage Him. He breathes grace over us. It settles upon us and gives us strength we never knew we had. We take flight again. We soar higher than we ever thought we could.

Now an angel of the Lord said to Philip, “Go south to the road—the desert road—that goes down from Jerusalem to Gaza.” So he started out, and on his way he met an Ethiopian eunuch, an important official in charge of all the treasury of the Kandake (which means “queen of the Ethiopians”). This man had gone to Jerusalem to worship, and on his way home was sitting in his chariot reading the Book of Isaiah the prophet. The Spirit told Philip, “Go to that chariot and stay near it.”

Then Philip ran up to the chariot and heard the man reading Isaiah the prophet. “Do you understand what you are reading?” Philip asked.

“How can I,” he said, “unless someone explains it to me?” So he invited Philip to come up and sit with him.

 This is the passage of Scripture the eunuch was reading:

 The eunuch asked Philip, “Tell me, please, who is the prophet talking about, himself or someone else?” Then Philip began with that very passage of Scripture and told him the good news about Jesus.

As they traveled along the road, they came to some water and the eunuch said, “Look, here is water. What can stand in the way of my being baptized?” And he gave orders to stop the chariot. Then both Philip and the eunuch went down into the water and Philip baptized him. When they came up out of the water, the Spirit of the Lord suddenly took Philip away, and the eunuch did not see him again, but went on his way rejoicing. Philip, however, appeared at Azotus and traveled about, preaching the gospel in all the towns until he reached Caesarea. (Acts 8:26-40)

This morning, while I was reading chapter 8 in the Book of Acts, the above verses caught my attention. A few lessons stood out to me as I studied them:

First,  Philip obediently moved forward wherever the Spirit was leading Him.  When he was advised to head South, he obeyed. When he was advised to walk alongside a chariot holding a stranger, he obeyed. (v  26-30)

Second, Philip met the eunuch where he was at.  When he was invited to jump into the chariot he didn’t say, I haven’t scheduled it on my calendar…let’s grab coffee next week.  No, he jumped in. Also, the man was reading specific verse in the Bible and Philip met the man where he was at…”Then Philip began with that very passage of Scripture and told him the good news about Jesus.”  (v 35)

Third, the eunuch listened and then took the next logical step…immediately.  “As they traveled along the road, they came to some water and the eunuch said, “Look, here is water. What can stand in the way of my being baptized?” (v 36)

Fourth, we might walk into another person’s story today for one purpose. “When they came up out of the water, the Spirit of the Lord snatched Philip away. The eunuch never saw him again but went on his way rejoicing.  Meanwhile, Philip found himself farther north at the town of Azotus. He preached the Good News there and in every town along the way until he came to Caesarea.” (v 39-40)

These verses reminded me that I don’t want to miss these moments of opportunity in my life as I go about my days. I want to go where I’m being called. I want to be willing to meet others where they are at. I want to be brave enough to take the next step. And then, I want to do it again the next day and the next day after that.

It’s Friday and time to link up with Lisa-Jo for Five Minute Friday. You can join in the fun HERE.

PROMPT: COMFORT

There is nothing that compares to God’s presence in the middle of life’s storms. Nothing. His comfort means everything. I’ve been thinking about this concept in the context of our wants versus our needs when we face trials.

A memory came to mind this morning when I saw Lisa-Jo’s prompt for today. I was leaving the hospital years ago with my dad and brother the night my mom died. As we walked to the car in the parking lot, I told my dad that in those final few minutes before she died I was just praying that God would take her. Up until that moment, I wanted a miracle. I wanted her five-year battle with cancer to suddenly disappear. I wanted my mom back, healthy.  But, in that moment of surrender, I knew what she needed. She needed to be with Him. Take her, Lord. Just take her.

Wants versus needs.

My dad still can’t walk almost a year after his stroke. Yesterday, on the phone he told me about the plans he has when he leaves the assisted living facility and finally goes home. My heart aches when he talks like this. I’m glad he holds onto hope beyond those four walls. Yet all the doctors say he has “plateaued” in his recovery. There is no going home.

I pray everyday that my dad would feel the comfort of His presence. I pray that God would give my dad what he needs.  I want a miracle.  I want him to walk.  He wants to walk.  But God…God knows what he needs.  And his greatest need right now, might not have anything to do with being able to get out of bed by himself.

Give him what he needs, Lord.  Just give him what he needs.

Oh, love me—and right now!—hold me tight!
just the way you promised.
Now comfort me so I can live, really live;
your revelation is the tune I dance to.
Psalm 119:76 Message

There’s something…beautiful (for lack of a better word) about the word beautiful. As I journey along life’s path, lessons seem to circle back to me via that one word. I’m certain a bit of it has to do with nostalgia. Yet, the word is also attached to a moment in my childhood that continues to teach and shape me today. Mark Batterson, in his book Soulprint, calls those times in our lives, life symbols.

If you’ve read my eBook, (and if you haven’t, why not? It’s free!) you know that when I was 8 years old the word beautiful caused “pain” in my life for one excruciating day. In the midst of my desire to give up and claim defeat, my mom came up with a creative solution to my dilemma. I have never forgotten that moment.

Because of this, lessons in my life always seem to circle back to that word. When I read a certain story in the Bible, when I listen to certain songs, such as this one, this one, and this one and when I read certain books. I come across this word and somehow it takes me by the hand and leads me back to the truths I need to cling to in my life.

• Don’t give up…walk through the pain…walk through the struggle. There is freedom and, yes, beauty waiting on the other side!

• Take time to look at or address the problems in your life in a more creative way.

• The nasty looking challenges we face today could turn out to be the beautiful message of hope He allows us to spread tomorrow!

I’m curious.  Do you have a word,  a life symbol…a defining moment in your past, that leads you to the truth you need to cling to? 

May is a big month of memories every year…but especially this year. I think about my mom quite a bit with Mother’s Day around the corner and her birthday at the end of the month. My mind can’t imagine what she would look like or be like at 77 years old. Yet, nearly 22 years later, I can still hear her beautiful laugh.

The memory that comes up most when I think about her, other than the back to back to back games of Scrabble we would play in the summer, is an image of her sitting in her blue robe at one end of our sectional couch. She sat there a lot during that last year of being sick. Sometimes she’s reading a book, sometimes she’s waiting for lunch and I’m in the kitchen preparing her favorite…Velveeta Shells & Cheese.

In hindsight, one of the “blessings” of losing my mom when I was 18 is that it forced my dad and I to become a little closer. He has softened quite a bit over the years.  We end every phone conversation we have nowadays with “I love you”.

Like I said, May is a month of memories this year.  So many things have changed in one year.

A year ago, I was working as a receptionist at an animal clinic.  Today, I am working as a virtual assistant out of my home (and loving it!)

A year ago, my husband was working as the computer/software guy for a company that does contract work for the Coast Guard. Today, he is 650 miles away transitioning into a new job down in Georgia.

A year ago, we were gearing up for the school year to end and looking forward to our community pool opening up and summer day trips to the beach. Today, we are gearing up for the school year to end, packing up the house and looking forward to joining my husband down in Georgia.

A year ago, my dad was a fiercely independent and active 72-year-old man. Today, after suffering a stroke on May 21 of last year, he is paralyzed on his left side, bed ridden, and dependent on others.

A year ago, I was getting excited and nervous about releasing my eBook on May 23 (My mom’s birthday). Today, as I continue trying to follow His lead and His prompting in my life, I wonder what’s around the corner. I have no idea. I couldn’t have imagined all this around the corner a year ago.

But, one thing’s for sure, wherever the road leads next, I’ll be writing it all down.

Where has the road taken you in one year’s time?