We often approach prayer with an agenda. We know what we want and we want God’s stamp of approval. I think we waste considerable amount of time fixated on our plans instead sitting at his feet and allowing Him to lead us down the best path.
When I was at the height of my addiction to alcohol, I approached the Lord with a plan. In the past I’ve referred to it as my win-win situation prayer. I could continue to drink but I would stop getting wasted every night. My one request was to drink to like a “normal” person.
So everyday, for a few months, my prayer was…Lord, I know I have a problem, but just help me to drink like a normal person. I just want to be normal.
I wasted time telling God what I wanted. My prayer was unproductive. I sat down one morning, frustrated that God was not answering my prayer. I realized I had nothing left to say. I couldn’t seem to achieve normal. I was done trying get the Lord to do things my way. And on that day, my prayer changed.
“Lord, change my heart. Make my desire for You stronger than my desire to drink.”
My prayer was answered. Not overnight. And, not without some pain. But my prayer was answered! *
After this season in my life, I learned one of the greatest lessons of my life.
God’s not after normal. God’s after our heart.
*November 27, 2011 I will celebrate 10 years of sobriety! (insert Snoopy happy dance here)